Sunday, April 20, 2008


No fake letter today. Here it is, plain and simple: Wendy, you should never have introduced wraps to the menu. First of all, my preliminary research (and by research, I mean I tried to remember) shows that in fashion and in food, the wrap has been irrelevant since 2005.

Secondly, contrary to popular belief (and by popular belief, I mean your silly new commercials) wraps are not less messy than sandwiches. They are not more ideal for people on the go. They're just an excuse to eat a burrito when you don't have a taste for Mexican.

Finally, the wrap is a flimsy sissy slap to the face of the menu choice that has made your establishment great: the sandwich.

So here is my advice to you: no more wraps. Bring back the monthly rotation of mouthwatering specialty sandwiches. The chicken cordon bleu. The monterey ranch chicken club. The chicken parmesan . . . dear me, that was the perfect sandwich. For the better part of a year you gave me a reason to come back again and again by offering a limited-time-only sandwich I simply had to have. Wraps? Wraps? There's not even bread on that. Dave would be ashamed of you.

Oh, and you should have given Michael Scott a chance. You two would have been cute.


beavermom said...

I couldn't agree more except that, if I go to Wendy's, I go for the same thing each time: single w/mustard & pickle, chili & a frosty. I've never altered my order - even for the time-limited chicken sandwiches. Even if I was tempted to order something else, it definitely would NOT be for a wrap!

The Bare's said...

I agree. Wraps are for people who want to fake like they're eating healthy. No one goes to Wendy's because it's health food, we go because we're all going to die and we might as well enjoy all this sinful sustenance before that happens.